Won’t you stay here a minute more
I know you want to walk through the door
But it’s all too fast
Let’s make it last a little while”
I received an email this week from google maps which told me all these amazing facts about where I went and what I did in 2019. 3 countries, 21 cities, 34 places at a distance of 15,000 miles or 60% around the world. I found this information to be fascinating for one, but when I tried to pinpoint all the places I went in 2019 it felt like more like chaos than a steady journey. Bouncing from place to place and wedding to wedding. Meeting the most amazing people and seeing these incredible places before having to dash onto the next. 2019 was beyond incredible, but I feel like I experienced it at someone else’s pace.
I have always been aspirational, someone who wants to sprint before they can crawl. I am impatient and avaricious and hungry. So in the middle of a wedding season with 30+ wedding bookings, 30+ couples shoots and a few elopements along the way I found myself wishing I could slow everything down. It was just too much and too fast but I couldn’t put the breaks on.
Last year I wrote that “my job as a wedding photographer, isn’t just to point and click. It’s not to just get the camera settings right (although that’s important too). It’s not a tick list or a range of motions that I go through. It is pushing my artistry and creativity as an individual who loves ‘love’ and who loves photography. It is creating something impossibly meaningful for two people who love one another in a way that is unique and beautiful. It is never underestimating how important this job is or how lucky I am that this is something I do well and get better at. It is always putting my heart into my work and being grateful that so many couples really love what I do.”
When I look back at my goals for 2019, I wanted to push myself harder than ever, to be better, stronger, to soar. And whilst I have pushed myself so hard to reach these goals I feel like what I love about wedding photography is slowly being left behind. It isn’t about the miles travelled, the weddings booked the countries visited or the awards (although all of these things are amazing of course). It is always, always about the people. It is about the love stories, the happy times, the connections. I want to spend 2020 being mindful of everything that brings me happiness and peace. I want to slow down so I don’t miss anything.